This year is going to be a little bit different for me as we are not on the main land we will not be doing the same things. Gone is the coal fire and finding the 9 foot Christmas tree (the cottage is not much taller than a hobbits home). Gone is the large party with buckets and buckets of Green Apple Martini's. Oh I have seen so many people with important jobs and titles leave our home, well crawl out really after a few of them (look them up in Nigella Lawson's cook book). So this year I will have to get my juices running finding other things to do.
Now I hope you do not think that a serious shopping Queen like myself waits until after October to start shopping for Christmas. I really started buying in August as when you have a 14 year old they are not happy with just a couple of presents, and I learnt a very long time ago that if you finish all the buying by the end of November it leaves your Husband with a lot more money in the account to buy you some beautiful gifts for his hard suffering wife. So here is the Queen's guide to a stress free Christmas......................
1: If you see it Buy it
Pick up a couple of items each week and remember to find a fab hiding place to stash them. Don't forget to remember where you stash them. One year I totally forgot I had given a friend loads of presents to keep from prying little eyes. She brought them around on Christmas Eve, I felt like a complete tit and one young son got a magical and expensive Christmas morning.
2: Keep to one theme
Each year I have a theme. Same colour decorations, same wrapping paper right down to the Christmas cards. OK for the last 7 years I have had a thing about blue and silver but you can never go wrong with a classic.
3: Do not buy cheap wrapping paper or cards
Now I am not being a snob but please keep away from that common cheap wrapping paper. I have this problem with my Mother, each year when we lived in Scotland she would send our presents wrapped in them and I always had to re wrap them because of all the rips. OK not the whole truth, I was not going to place that common paper under my tree so I do always re wrap any presents that arrive before the day in the themed paper.
4: Cards, Cards, Cards
Don't leave it to the last second to write the cards. If possible get someone else to do the job, well I am a Queen and my wrists are not that strong. Do Not get stressed if you receive a card from someone you have not sent. It is a waste of time and effort, put them on your list for New Year cards. Have the cards written by the 1st December.
5: Trees and decorations
There is only two ways to go with trees and decorations. Classy or trashy, of course I always go classy but plenty of people including every member of my close family go trashy. I only have the tree with a couple of select items dotted about. Tinsel is a No No, common as muck and try to get a real Tree. A small real one is better than a big thick false one (sorry lost the plot there, forgot we were talking about trees). If you want to spend money buy a real wreath for your front door, beautiful and so welcoming putting a smile on any one's face before they enter your home.
6: Food
Don't go crazy with loads of food as it only goes to waste. Be smart and go to someone else's home for Christmas day lunch. I have for the last 5 years, well I am tired by the time the big day has arrived and I can only just manage to lift the glass of sloe gin and I am no good stuffing anything by then. Plus the shops are only closed now for one day so not long to wait.
7: Sloe Gin
Make sure you have a large supply of Sloe Gin, once the kids are off school it is best to be plastered until they return to school in January. Plus you never know when a certain Queen will be cumming to town.
There is a few details I have missed but you get the idea, so good luck and most of all have fun. Remember the fun is in the giving but remember what presents you get so if it is really bad you can return the favour the next year.
5: Trees and decorations
6: Food
Don't go crazy with loads of food as it only goes to waste. Be smart and go to someone else's home for Christmas day lunch. I have for the last 5 years, well I am tired by the time the big day has arrived and I can only just manage to lift the glass of sloe gin and I am no good stuffing anything by then. Plus the shops are only closed now for one day so not long to wait.
7: Sloe Gin
Make sure you have a large supply of Sloe Gin, once the kids are off school it is best to be plastered until they return to school in January. Plus you never know when a certain Queen will be cumming to town.
There is a few details I have missed but you get the idea, so good luck and most of all have fun. Remember the fun is in the giving but remember what presents you get so if it is really bad you can return the favour the next year.
